Let Me Entertain You

Today’s post is written by our Brave Artist Mariah Neilson

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 gatsby-party

Let me entertain you.

That would be easier.

Easier than opening up to you.

It would be easy to create a story,

so you can’t see my pain.

 

Let me entertain you.

Something – interesting. Enticing. Alluring.

I will tell wild tales of adventure.

Just don’t ask me how I am doing.

 

Let me entertain you.

I’ll tell you my fantasies,

but don’t ask about my struggles.

 

Let me entertain you.

I do not want to be vulnerable.

 

Let me entertain you.

 

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I wrote this poem because sometimes it feels easier for me to cover up my pain and hurt instead of being honest about it. Distraction is my way to avoid talking about pain and hurt. I would rather entertain you with a dramatic story, instead of sharing what is going on in my heart. I struggled with writing today’s post, because I did not want to be vulnerable. I did not want to share my feelings. I wanted to write an elaborate travel narrative, something that would make you feel good and maybe laugh a little. But I can’t hide behind this keyboard, creating tales to entertain. I wanted to be a Live Brave team member, because I wanted to push my self to be vulnerable and honest. But the truth is, I don’t want to be honest, I don’t want to share my flaws. That is painful. But entertaining tales only go so far. They are shallow and when they are over, most people carry on, the tale did not change those who heard. Being honest, that is how people connect, relate, and sympathize with each other.

As easy as it is for me to entertain… as hard as it is to be vulnerable… here is my starting place.

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Mariah Neilson is 20 years old. She is a newly claimed artist, a Live Brave Artist, with a passion for photography, long walks and everything pink. She is in her third year of college,  working on her bachelors degree in Psychology with a minor in Global Cultural studies. She works in her school library and loves to read. Her goal in life is to live a life that is full of grace and compassion. In free time she likes to write and explore this beautiful world around me. Mariah also writes on newfoundponderings.wordpress.com and shares her photography on treasuredhope.wordpress.com

Photo taken from: http://blog.fiestah.com/2013/08/27/theme-party-ideas-the-great-gatsby/

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6 thoughts on “Let Me Entertain You

  1. i just wrote a post on how hard it is for me to share my real story…to not just divert with humor or another tale (much like you describe here). Vulnerability draws us near, but we have to get past our fear of it (and possible rejection). You are brave friend. Keep sharing the funny and the real (if they are different or the same)

  2. Your bravery helps me, and I’m sure many others, realize my own vulnerabilities. Thank you for your honesty, and sharing.

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