Today’s post comes from Brave Writer, Melanie Neilson.
I gazed at the smorgasbord of choices. Curiosity, confidence, wonder, obligation, certainty, conviction, and repulsion rose to the surface, each one rising higher than the other as my gaze floated from one choice to the next. Choices.
For many years I thought having many choices was the best way to live life. I must keep my options open. Never box yourself in. It’s too confining. It’s limited. You might get caught in something you hate. You may take on something that is way over your head. They may find out that you are not qualified. You’ll look stupid. Pick something adventurous, but safe. Choices.
I found that playing it safe was more difficult than choosing to listen to what my heart was telling me. My heart didn’t always make sense. It wanted me to answer curiosity. It told me to step out even if I wasn’t confident. Wonder wooed me to seek an answer. Obligation was telling me I had to, verses my heart telling me I could if I wanted to. Certainty was nowhere to be found. Conviction poked my heart until I responded. And, repulsion asked my heart why. My heart did not want me to stay in a safe zone. Choices.
Pain pushed me to choices. Desire for intimacy with God drove me to choices. Unsettled emotions begged me to choices. Ultimate love carried me to choices.
I began to listen to my heart more. Take chances that were not as safe. Choices that led me down roads that were unfamiliar, uncomfortable, challenging but liberating, adventurous and purposeful. I found myself with fewer choices, but choices that mattered. The smorgasbord became an entrée. Variety of color, full of texture, and assorted flavors, but an entrée instead of a smorgasbord. Choices.
But wait!!! The entrée meant stepping out of the smorgasbord line. It meant letting go of the array of choices, the vast options, the safety of too many choices.
It required focus, discipline, strategy, or so I thought.
It actually required deep faith. Choices.
Choices. It required living brave.
Melanie is a wife, mom, and grammy to an amazing family of twelve. She is a friend, daughter, sister, pastor, and advocate for justice. Her heart goes beyond the borders of the United States and longs to love others the way Jesus does.
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