{Thanks} What?

Thanksgiving

Today’s post comes from our Live-Brave Founder and Creator, Lesley Glenn.

I am going to be a little vulnerable here and share with  you a few things about myself that might make you… {gasp}.

Ready?

Yesterday, at Target, I told a lady to get out of my way in the cosmetic section,  and my husband, who was manning our cart, looked at me in shock.

Yep, me.   

I also blasted another woman via email for her marketing ploy in obtaining my email address in her attempt to get me to sign up for her multi-level marketing scheme.

Yep, I really did.  

And then, at the grocery store, I joined in the “who are these greedy/selfish people who go out to shop on Thanksgiving and black Friday” conversation with the checker and the bag clerk. s.

So much for gratitude and thanksgiving.  I had become the proverbial pot calling the kettle black stereotype.

Thanksgiving is usually my favorite holiday.  It wasn’t this year.

My ungrateful attitude started when my oldest son  informed me that he had to work not only “ON” Thanksgiving but also through Black Friday. He works in retail.

It escalated when I saw people camped out in front of my local Best Buy two days before the holiday. (see above sentence)

Intensified when the realization that this was the first year we would not be taking our annual family picture.

And it all fell apart,  when my double ovens wouldn’t work on Thanksgiving Day and so our meal didn’t happen until very late that night.

I, then,  just sunk into a pathetic pity party of sorts, remembering how the year before, our “other”  house was FULL of family from Hawaii and Seattle.  How, ALL of my kids were home, no one was away at college,  and none of them had to work (retail), every appliance worked and, we were surrounded by friends and a community we were familiar with.

And the funk followed me up until dinner time last night,when my husband jolted me out of my miserable self and said in a nice but loving and firm way,

“What is wrong with you, this is not like you at ALL.”

I went in my bedroom to pout some more because I had just been reprimanded,  and after some quiet time finally came to my senses and realized how ridiculous I was being and it was embarrassing.  Literally.

I had to take mental, spiritual and physical notes of why I had allowed myself to take a bumpy trip down “Self Pity Lane”, but most of all, I had to forgive myself for allowing it and not catching it. If I didn’t shame would sneak in.

That was my BRAVE.

Sometimes one has  to fall apart so that one  can recalibrate.  When your internal well being, presence of mind, body and spirit are not aligning with your external circumstances and vice versa, it’s time to step back and take a break, go within be silent and let GO.

That stepping back is BRAVE.

I wish I could tell you that I am fine now and all is well with my soul.  But that would be lying and I am not that {pretending} person anymore.   For me to refocus on the present, and HIS presence, means I need to do some self care.  More writing, more creating, and  more generosity.

Self Care is BRAVE Care is Must Care.

So,  I packed up my bag along with my journals. I also loaded up in my car one of our Christmas tree’s and some decorations that used to adorn my much LARGER house and I cooked another Thanksgiving meal.

I am heading east an hour and a half away, to share a late Thanksgiving with that oldest boy of mine,  who worked 18 hours straight on Thanksgiving and who has not had a full day off in a week. We are going to decorate his apartment for Christmas and watch the SeaHawks dominate the Saints on Monday Night Football.  We are going to laugh and talk and plan how he won’t be working retail again next year.

But before I hop into my car, I am going to email an apology to the woman I put on blast. Thank my wonderful husband for being patient and kind and hug my middle boy for getting at least one of the ovens to work.

For  all of you who did go shopping on Thanksgiving, I’m sorry I contributed to a conversation that made you out to be selfish, greedy and non family oriented.

Finally, I wish I could apologize to that poor  woman in Target but now in retrospect, I don’t think she understood English , which means I am off the hook right?  right?

signature

Lesley is a Wife. Mom. Friend. Sister. Daughter. Artist, and Writer. Stage 4 Cancer fighter. Authentic. Passionate Risk Taker. She runs Dandelion Wishes, Inc. and Live Brave, Not Broken. She also writes alongside her husband at http://www.miraculouslife.org, and will soon be releasing her spiritual, physical and soulful journey of thriving with cancer at: http://www.eatlivegrow.com (coming January 2014)

photo credit: flatworldsedge via phot

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14 thoughts on “{Thanks} What?

  1. Much wisdom here – and refreshing honesty. I commend you and I appreciate the encouragement and practical instruction as well as the good example. Especially the reminder about self care – good stuff!

  2. I love your realness! Thank you for being BRAVE enough to share your journey. As I read your post, I was reminded of where I was NOT thankful or kind over the weekend. As much as I was thankful and kind, there were still times, I can say I was NOT. Your words give me courage to apologize where needed, to “self care” (or I’ll have to apologize again) and to do the things that really matter (like spend time, quality time with our loved ones). ENJOY your time with your oldest son. WHo knows, maybe the Seahawks will win like the Cowboys!!! ❤

  3. This Thanksgiving was so off in so many ways that I went home early and pouted. .
    Thank you for being Brave & Real
    PS
    Oh when The Saints come marching in 🏈

    1. Hey Kimberly. Transitional year for sure. No one said we had to get it right, because what is right? I think we pull back re evaluate and make amends with ourselves that all is still well. I know for me, I have to now look at Christmas with a different light, because the traditions I have held onto for so long with my little familia, are changing and I have to be okay with that. I am not there yet, but at least recognize the change. Step one. 😉 I love you to the moon and back.
      PS: Sorry about your Saints. ❤ GO HAWKS!!

  4. I love you Lesley! I, too, was in a Thanksgiving slump and chose to go to bed early rather than spend time with my family and “face the music” that I don’t have control over the happenings of a day, even on my favorite holiday. In retrospect, I was hard on myself and chose to sulk rather than detach and evaluate myself through the eyes of grace and thanksgiving. Thank God yesterday’s lesson can still be applied in current and future dates 😉

    Jazzy

  5. Hugs to you, Lesley. So sorry your Thanksgiving was a bit of a train wreck (I’ve had WAY too many of those myself) but so glad you are finding the redemption in it. Ironically I wrote a post last week (I’ll post it tomorrow) about tips for getting through the holiday blues. You already used several of them (you’re reading my mail–lol). Glad you are off to have a bit of a redo with your boy. Hope you have a blast with him. Wave to me when you’re on your way out of my part of town. xoxo

  6. Love, love, love your brave honesty! And your beautiful reminder about self care – and it looking different on everyone! Thanks so much for being a huge inspiration to me!

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